By: Amanda Anderson
Now I know I may ruffle some feathers with this post, but I thought this post could maybe force ladies to think a little differently when we choose the men we date. Rather you believe it or not, celebrities aren’t that much different from “regular people.” Stars deal with the same situations we face everyday, the only difference is their lives are on display for the whole world to see. So what better way to learn some of life’s biggest lessons than to watch those who must publicly endure them?
I am probably one of the most career driven women you will ever meet. In fact, most of my girlfriends are the same way. We are young, focused, and working each day to get a step closer to our dreams. Along the path to success; we will date, fall in love, and get our hearts broken a time or two. But should we ever risk our career and life’s work for a relationship or a man that could be toxic to our career and overall goodness? Let’s look at a few examples of women who did just that.
Gabrielle Union is one of the most gorgeous black actresses in the business. She has had a successful career that involves a number of films and even had success as a model with such campaigns like Neutrogena. The bubbly actress has even touched our hearts with her story of being a rape victim and she even writes positive blogs to encourage young women to chase after their dreams.
Although she comes off as such a great person, for the last year we aren’t reading about any of those wonderful things. We are only hearing about her “scandalous” relationship with basketball star Dwayne Wade. For the last year or so, she has been ripped apart on celebrity gossip blogs and even labeled as a “home wrecker.”
Union has even had legal troubles as a result of her relationship with Wade. She has had to sue authority gossip site Bossip for their continuous negative portrayal, and now she is even being sued herself by Dwayne Wade’s ex wife Siohvaughn Wade for $50,000 for failure to monitor Wade’s kids during a recent visit. The suit even claims that Union and Wade were involved in inappropriate “couple” behavior in front of the kids.
Is D-Wade worth the legal troubles, dealings with a lunatic ex-wife, and the deterioration of Union’s image? Hmmm…probably not.
And while things could be worse for Union, worst is exactly what leads us to Whitney Houston.
Whitney Houston has been known for decades as one the greatest singers. She was a vocal powerhouse, and she had plenty of hit albums under her belt for many years. What little girl on this Earth hasn’t picked up a hairbrush (now you know you used your hairbrush as your pretend microphone) and tried their hardest to be the next Whitney Houston? Houston is one of the most influential women in music, and she is the reason why most of today’s singers ever got started in music.
But Whitney’s career began to take a nasty turn after she met and married fellow R&B singer Bobby Brown. During the marriage, Houston became addicted to drugs. She was known to be on cocaine and marijuana, and there were reports that Brown was even abusive towards the legendary singer.
Houston’s one of a kind voice even started to change, and the money problems began to hit home. She went from being one of the greatest singers in the world to one of the biggest jokes in Hollywood. Interviewers took advantage of the singer (remember “Crack is wack?”), and she in so many ways confirmed that she had hit rock bottom.
Fast forward to now, she released a successful album, but her voice has been criticized more than it has been praised. She is missing performances, and there are rumors circulating that the singer may be taking drugs again. The rumors could all be fluff, but would she have had to make a comeback if she never met and married Bobby Brown? Probably not.
And the list goes on, but I will stop here because it isn’t really important which celebrity I name, the results are strikingly similar. As a woman, you have to be extremely careful who you select as a partner. You may spend most of your lifetime achieving greatness and securing your dreams, but it will only take one person to undo a lifetime of sacrifice and hard work. Real love won’t destroy your life, and it damn sure won’t change you for the worse.
Learn from these ladies, and choose a mate that compliments your life, not someone who will destroy it.