By: Amanda Anderson
Why is it that we think some people are exempt to the dynamics of heartbreak? It’s as if a pretty face is somehow a shield against the inevitability of life, and the growing pains that we are all are subjected to as we chase that one big love, and our only shot at Happily Ever After. When we hear stories of beautiful Hollywood actresses losing husbands to affairs with less than worthy side pieces, we’re amazed and in utter disbelief that someone that gorgeous could suffer the same fate as a woman who may lack the good looks that Hollywood requires. We think to ourselves,”‘Who the hell would cheat on Halle Berry?” But the question we should be asking is why on earth do we keep believing that the physical is enough to sustain happiness? As a society, we put more effort into our looks, wardrobes, and other meaningless traits; and can’t seem to quite understand why half the newlyweds will be headed to divorce court in less than 5 years. We’ve lost our minds thinking the physical is enough to carry a relationship over into bliss.
And it seems the pretty women have lost their minds too, picking some of the ugliest and most selfish men ever to share their lives with. It happens so much that it’s expected that some gorgeous woman will have a try at love and come to the conclusion that an ugly man will treat her better. Less competition she thinks, but she fails to take into consideration that selfishness isn’t restricted to the more attractive brothers.
How does it happen? These ugly men have beautiful word play. They say the right things, and woo their prospective lovers in a way they have never been wooed. “Oh he’s so romantic” she utters as the flowers just keep on coming. All the while he pokes his chest out as he silently celebrates his victory of nabbing the one woman his friends said he could never have. You finally whisper the three words of death “I love you.” Wedding bells are no longer a fantasy.
Within the first year of marriage or even courting, this man reveals that he is just as much as a selfish bastard as that Pretty Boy you had a thing for back in college. He’s controlling, manipulative, and has your self-esteem dwindling.
But you thought you’d be safe with the ugly man, right?
You thought the romantic gestures would be permanent, you thought he’d treat you like a goddess because you’re the most beautiful woman he’s ever been with, right?
And who’d ever think that someone else would fall for the same game you fell for? That whole time you thought he’d be faithful because he had no options, he was wooing multiple women that you had no clue about.
While it is foul for any brother to step out of a committed relationship, your attitude of entitlement is just as foul. Sure, you’re gorgeous and you piss fabulousness without even trying, but it doesn’t mean that you don’t have to work in your relationships.
Your good looks also don’t give you the pass to refrain from picking men based on character alone, and not their physical qualities.
Now I’m not trying to diss my beautiful sisters, but take it from a woman who has been there and done ugly, looks no longer serve importance in my quest for everlasting love. And if you’re smart, it shouldn’t serve importance to you either.
Take notes ladies, nothing is more revealing than character. Rather it’s at the hands of good looks or borderline ugly, romantic gestures can never take the place of good character. And even flowers can’t diminish the greatness of a man who is good to the core.