An Obsession With the Spotlight: Flava Flav Is Still Cooning For A Living

Why won’t Flavor Flav accept that his career is over?

By: Taren Vaughan

Even after they are way past their prime, some celebrities feel the need to continuously find their way back to the spotlight once again. From appearing in reality TV shows to attempting to start their own businesses, they will try any and everything to get at least one ounce of fame back that they once had before. For most of us, we would rather they just go sit their asses down somewhere or at least do something productive during their reappearances. But for them, it’s just another chance to revisit stardom one last time. And who better at pulling this stunt than the one and only Flavor Flaaaav.

William Drayton Jr. always finds a way to make us say his name one more time. But too bad most of his attempts have led him absolutely nowhere as far as money or limelight is concerned. Take “The Flavor Of Love” for example. Two words…Epic fail. Not only did he make a pure fool himself on the show with every episode. But he had the audacity to drag other industry cats into that nonsense as well. And let’s not even get on the caliber of females that he had up there. That show was more like a straight up comedy if you ask me. He couldn’t have possibly been looking for a wife in some of those chicks. That show was for sheer entertainment purposes only. But then again, this is Flavor Flav that we are talking about here so he probably would have put a ring on one of those girls’ finger. Oh excuse me, I meant give them a set of gold teeth as his way of tying the knot. As it served for a great laugh and lasted for a couple seasons, who really took Flav seriously with this show? Nobody with any good sense that’s for damn sure.

Since the last season of “The Flavor Of Love”, thoughts of Flav have virtually left our minds. At this point, I honestly thought he would be somewhere chillin’, doing things that most 51 year olds do like playing golf and or out somewhere relaxing on the beach. But that’s way too normal for Flav to do. He has to be doing something outrageous or ridiculous or it just wouldn’t be right. And now he has come up with yet another “brilliant” way to get his pockets right again.

Get ready folks because Flav is coming out with his very own fried chicken franchise. Oh don’t act like this tidbit of information shocked you. We all know Flav is the King of cooning so this is pretty much right up his alley. And to top it all off, he is pulling a “Diddy” and coming out with his own vodka line, “Le Flav Spirits”. Now doesn’t he just sound like the next Warren Buffett? With his track record, chances are that this little plan of his will probably tank just like the other projects that he has taken on. I could have sworn that reality TV was Flav’s cup of tea. I guess he had a recent change of heart.

Seriously though, what is really good with this dude? Mid life crisis perhaps? Or maybe he is just that broke that he needs to find any and every way to make ends meet. Whatever it is, it must be stopped immediately. I’d rather see him pick up a mic and start rapping again. When he was with Public Enemy as their hype man, at least he was doing something world changing and that really had us thinking about real issues in today’s society when he did that. This was when myself and other people of the world actually took him seriously.

Back in the day, rocking the big clock around his neck drew much attention and started a semi-fashion trend amongst Hip-Hop heads. But at the age of 51, don’t you think it’s time to give up the big clocks Flav? Let’s try wearing a regular watch on your wrist like most grown people do. The cornrows, grills, crowns and Viking hat; it’s about time to put those things to rest homie. Let it go Flav. YOUR time is up.

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