Regardless of what you’ve heard, yes, there are many types of men. While most women would ideally like to continue to pretend that the pivotal signs of jacked up morale in a potential aren’t necessarily there; the truth of the matter is, most douche bags are obvious even on the very first encounter. Women don’t always have to wait to discover the true side of a man, they can simply measure his character by the first approach.
Now many of you will say you are already quite aware of the importance of a man’s first approach, but by the looks of the majority of relationship failures, I’m not quite sure we do. There will always be the men who play gentleman prematurely for panty dropping purposes, but yet, most of us continue to ignore the early signs of a ratchet relationship before it even begins.
Regardless of how charming and coy he might have been…a big mouthed man will not only holler at you, but anything else with a vagina. And being in a relationship won’t hold him back, nor contain his immaturity.
Let’s talk about just what exactly constitutes as “hollering.”
Hollering is when a man approaches you with some kind of wack line, comedic/romantic gesture…usually with an air of arrogance, like he’s done it many times before. Women will say they never fall for these types of guys, but they do so most of their dating lives.
And we’ll usually entertain the bullsh-t if this man is attractive, and simply label the wack lines and/or approach as cute and charming.
What we don’t factor in is how easy it is to holler. All a man simply has to do is get your attention in some public area, say a few lines, compliment you a few times…and then he gets your telephone number.
And just like that…you begin to entertain the jackass that only put in the minimum to get your attention. And not only did he get your attention in a matter of minutes, but he’ll be sexing you by the second or third date tops.
If it was that easy to get your attention, can we be surprised that they turn around and duplicate the same method each time with multiple women, while being in a “committed” relationship?
Now you might take offense, and even ask me how should you be approached, if hollering at you is deemed a waste of time. Here’s my philosophy:
The man that builds puts in the time, so he won’t waste YOUR time. But the man that hollers, uses less of his own time, but will always waste yours. Simply put, if a man is truly interested in you, he’ll approach you seriously–and you’ll know if he’s worth it because he will then spend most of his energy getting to know you.
This past weekend, I grabbed some Italian cuisine with my sister. We chose the spot because it was low key, but before we could even begin eating our food, 2 big mouthed men came by and began to serenade two uninterested women.
This “serenade” ended with a host of wack lines and 5 minutes too long of pointless conversation. Clearly our minds are on other men who didn’t serenade us or approach us with lines to get our attention, but instead, took the time to get to know us on a more mature level. But for many women who weren’t preoccupied and happy, the serenade would have worked. And honestly, it should never work, rather you’re single or committed.
No matter how attractive a man is, educated he may be, or interesting he may seem; if a man hollers at you, he will most certainly holler at someone else while he’s with you. And it’s simply because men value the things and women they have to work for…and hollering and sexing these same big mouthed dudes before they commit to you just isn’t smart.
The man that builds with you most likely won’t be trying to build with someone else at the same time. And that’s because it just takes too much work to establish a foundation, but it only takes minutes to holler at someone. If you’ve been dealing with a man for three to five dates and know little about him, he ain’t building with you. He hollered, and only plans to keep you around until something new comes along.
If a man can’t genuinely approach you with some respect, invoke intelligent conversation, and a show a genuine interest in you without relying on lines and weak a– game; you’d be better off without him. Patience is a virtue, but for the life of me, I can’t understand why women just can’t be happy by their damn selves until they meet a man who is serious about them and maintaining a relationship. And nine times out of ten, that kind of man won’t approach you with some foolishness.
It’s time to leave the men alone who talk more than they commit…