Just another column from an educated black man who doesn’t spare feelings or understand why some women attribute their relationship status to a result of being too “strong.”
By: Mike J.
My ex-girlfriend was a b-tch.
I’m not a thug. I’m not an aspiring rapper. And I don’t hate women. But I’m a grown man that understands that women can be b-tches; and my awareness of that fact doesn’t make me disrespectful, but instead observant. Now that I got that out the way…
My ex-girlfriend was a b-tch.
Ever met a woman that’s so angry, you swore she must have woke up that way every single day? Well that’s her. She has a pretty serious attitude problem that I wasn’t made aware of until we were a couple months into the relationship. I guess b-tchiness was reserved for comfort because I didn’t see it until her guard was down. Even though everyone else knew she was a b-tch, she spent most of her time complaining of the struggles of being a “strong black woman.” In black man’s language, that really just means “Hey, I’m an annoying b-tch.”
Right now somewhere in this country there’s a small group of single black women talking out their frustrations with black men. They’ll blame everything on our “love of white women,” our inability to stay out of prison, to their “understanding” that black men are intimidated by their careers and education.
But I’m an educated black man that has never dated a white woman. I’ve never been to prison. And every black woman I’ve ever been with has had a college degree and full time job.
I’m not unique either, but plenty of black women would like to pretend I am just to free themselves of any responsibility in their dating failures.
But if you’re what you say you are, why talk so much about it?
Coretta Scott King didn’t have to remind Martin Luther King about how strong she was. Rosa Parks didn’t tell the bus driver she was a “strong black woman” when she refused to get up and moved to the back of the bus. Nor did Michelle Obama have to continuously remind Barack that she was college educated.
The strength and education in all of these women was evident by what they did and how they carried themselves. But for you youngin’s, your career and education are the two things you feel entitle you to a man.
I understand we have issues in the black community, and black men need to step up to the plate…become better fathers, husbands, and stop impregnating women before we marry them. But if you’re an adult, can’t you bare some responsibility as to why you’re not where you want to be relationship wise?
Some of y’all haven’t found the right man because you’re too busy fu-king the wrong man.
Look, are we really going to pretend that educated black women are single because too many black men are in prison? I’m pretty sure that any brother in the pen can’t be compatible to a degree toting sister. He was propped on the street corners, while you were taking classes. You ain’t checking for the dudes in prison, but you’re pushing away your potential partners who have avoided prison because you’ve missed it.
So why can’t you attract a black man who has as much to bring to the table as you? For some, it’s your attitude.
A strong black woman doesn’t mean a loud, obnoxious, angry and self centered woman. None of those aforementioned traits can be found in a strong person. If you’re any of those things, you’re not strong, you’re bitter. And it’s just not appealing to an educated black man who has plenty to offer you.
I ended up breaking things of with my ex girlfriend. The relationship drained me. The tension drained me. She drained me.
And guess what? She’s still single and still blaming our failed relationship on me not being to handle a “strong black woman.” So what does it mean when no one can handle you?