What happened to the sacredness of marriage?
By: Amanda Anderson
In a country where the divorce rate among married couples has reached its peak at 50%, many people are starting to wonder rather anyone truly values marriage anymore. What was once regarded as a sacred practice between two people willing to commit their love in the presence of God, has now turned into a laughing joke amongst most Americans. And although things have changed over the last couple of decades, could it be that the destruction of marriage may be a result of a society of people more interested in themselves? Have we really forgotten how to make marriage work or are we really just that selfish that we are not willing to try?
While all marriages may not end for the same reason, according to research, most marriages end in divorce for financial reasons. Money problems are a sure way to add stress to any relationship, and can cause a couple to be at odds with one another. Although we take vows to stay with our spouses “for richer or poorer,” most people choose to divorce once the money becomes scarce. While it can be devastating to watch your bills become unpaid, God believes a marriage is supposed to overcome that. So why don’t we believe that too?
Some marriages end because a spouse has made the poor decision to step outside of their marriage. Infidelity is one of the toughest things that a marriage can ever endure. It causes emotional damage to the spouse on the receiving end of its wrath, and it also causes the guilty spouse to lose the trust that was earned over the course of the relationship.
While we may promise to “forsake all others” on our wedding day, there are a lot of Americans who don’t actually plan to stay faithful. These individuals are as faithful as their options, and totally misunderstand the meaning of marriage. If the thought of having sex with the same person for the rest of your life frightens you, does it make sense to get married? Bed hopping while being married is extremely low down and dangerous. There have been plenty of cases in which cheating spouses have infected their faithful spouses with AIDS/HIV and other STD’s. These people should have never walked down the aisle because they never mastered the self-control that it takes to be faithful.
Some say a marriage ends because they have fallen out of love with their spouse. While it’s totally possible to lose that spark in a marriage, it is not impossible to get it back. And honestly, that is one of the dumbest reasons to get divorced. Honestly, we lose spark in our regular non-martial relationships, so why would marriage be any different. It takes a lot of work to keep love in a marriage. If you don’t want to do the work, don’t propose to anyone or except any engagement rings.
It is time for people to start being totally honest with themselves. If you know that you cannot spend the rest of your life with one person, then don’t ever get married. I don’t care how wonderful your partner seems or how great the sex is between you two, you are not cut out for marriage.
And regardless of what society may say, you do not have to get married. If marriage is not something that you can really commit too, do yourself and your partner a huge favor and avoid the alter in all ways possible.
Most importantly, if you are not willing to do the work that it takes to keep a marriage together, you would be a fool to get married.
Newsflash, you shouldn’t divorce someone because you fell out of love. Marriage isn’t one of your high school relationships in which you grow tired of someone after a while and move on. It’s a COMMITMENT between you, your partner, and GOD. And God never said we should get a divorce because we have fallen out of love. If you have lost that romance, work with your partner to get it back. There have been plenty of couples who lost their spark but took the necessary steps to retrieve the love that they lost over time.
Marriage counseling, support from loved ones, and a partner that truly believes in working on your marriage is the key to refrain from becoming another statistic.
If you really have a relationship with God, you should value marriage just as much as He does. It may be hard to do in a world that continues to lack in morals, but no one said marriage would be easy. So prepare for the battle if you are thinking about stepping onto the battlefield. If not, don’t sign up.