After Lamar calls her bluff, Iyanla convinces Lamar to stay on her terms.
Part 3 opens with Iyanla reacting to Lamar’s sudden disinterest in finishing up the counseling session, and embarrassing his wife Vakhara. Previously, he told everyone that he was her pastor and he had “s*** else to do.”
Iyanla reveals to Vakhara and the women a bet he made with the other husbands about crying first. Iyanla says that he has been fighting against his healing to win the bet. Iyanla asks him next what he want, and Lamar says he wants to get out of the house. So he leaves, but Cornelius and Dwight walk out with him.
The other husbands try to confront him about his behavior, but Lamar doesn’t care.
“Well I guess I just don’t give a f***.” – Lamar
Despite this, Dwight still tries to coach him, but Lamar just walks off, telling “the whole show” to kiss his a**.
As he walks away to the guest house, Iyanla follows and confronts him. She tells him his behavior was disrespectful to his wife. Iyanla wants to know what specifically triggered him to do this.
Lamar repeats that he learned all he needed. However, Iyanla tells him that he doesn’t know how to use it. As Iyanla talks, Lamar still comes off as defiant to everything. So, Iyanla tells him he has to change or he has to leave.
Lamar is calling her bluff, and gets ready to leave. Before he leaves, Iyanla brings Vakhara to him. Lamar tells them both that he isn’t leaving on his own.
“You kicked me out.” – Iyanla
Iyanla then pleads with him to start looking at things differently because his current behavior isn’t safe for Vakhara. Lamar simply tells her that her feelings is her opinion.
Vakhara then tells Lamar that he is letting her down by leaving.
“By leaving, you’re leaving me hanging like you’ve always done.” – Vakhara.
She then tells Lamar that she can’t allow him to keep disrespecting me.
“It’s too much and it’s been too much.” – Vakhara.
She lastly tells him that they cannot longer continue this marriage. Lamar replies, “The devil is a lie.”
He then says, “Time to go,” and continues to packs.
Vakhara says her marriage is done, and Iyanla agrees.
Iyanla says their marriage has become too toxic and it’s time to cut out the waste. They can also focus on building new relationships with themselves and others in the future.
Lamar tells Vakhara that they got a car for the both of them and tries to get her to leave with him. He then takes her into the guest house to talk. Iyanla is nervous about his intentions to possibly blame everything on her.
“Well done on Ms. Vanzant’s process to tell me I’m done with the process.” – Lamar
Production realizes that this is a potentially dangerous situation and cancel out their privacy by showing breaking into the guest house after he locked the door. Vakhara is adamant to stay but Lamar is still leaving. Iyanla says that by allowing them to break them away from the group by controlling her.
As he tries to get into the car, Iyanla pleads with him to stay. He says he wants to finish the process. However, Iyanla says he has to do this in his terms. He decides to stay.
Later on, Iyanla sits with the other couples and tells him that Lamar stayed. She wants them to give him feedback about everything. She then asks Vakhara about this and she says that this behavior is a pattern. Iyanla then tells him that this behavior from Lamar is abusive, and needs to come to terms with it.
“Here’s the reality; you are an abused woman.” – Iyanla
Lamar reluctantly agrees with Iyanla and Vakhara about his marriage.
She then goes to Lamar, who is sitting in a hospital bed. She gives him a card with things to focus on, which includes humility and openness. She then tells him that his behavior is abusive towards Vakhara. She then has Cornelius and Dwight talk to him. Dwight tells Lamar that his behavior reminds him of how he treated Marcia. Cornelius says he was where Lamar is mentally before he got locked up.
Marcia tells Lamar that he does look like he always has his guard up, and needs to be broken down to have a breakthrough. Lamar agrees with her.
Before the next person stops by, Iyanla asks him how it would feel if their marriage was over. Although he says it would be devastating, Iyanla lets him know that it may be that way, due to Vakhara being an abused woman. However, she also suspects Vakhara also is abusive towards Lamar
Lamar agrees, and Vakhara stops by. Lamar says he is sick and Vakhara says, “Maybe I should let you die.” Iyanla tells him that’s what he does to her. She then tells Vakhara to be clearer when she says their marriage is over.
Vakhara then tells him that she is stifling her happiness and health being with him. Lamar said her leaving feels like he is dying. He then says that he needs to a better job thinking before he speaks. He admits that he does things to push Vakhara away, and push her buttons. He lastly admits that their marriage ending may be a good thing for Vakhara.
Iyanla tells them that their marriage is over and everything between them will change between them behavior. She also suggests to tear everything down between them to rebuild something new.
“You gotta let this die, because on the outside looking in, it looks ugly.” – Iyanla
When Vakhara leaves, Iyanla tells Lamar that he did great work opening himself up to the feedback from her.
Iyanla gives her “prescriptions” to the couples.
Before everyone leaves, Iyanla will give them a “prescription,” for them to use to work on their relationship at home.
La’Gena says that she will let Cornelius have time to grow, but they will fight for their marriage. They both also say they will still live with one another.
“I am going to sit back and let God make him the man he wants to be.” – La’Gena
Iyanla tells them not to do anything involving their relationship for the next 30 days.
After they leave, it is confirmed that La’Gena is in therapy and Cornelius is working to improve his communication skills and self-worth. As a result, their marriage is getting better day by day.
Dwight says that he is prepared to let go of Marcia, saying he is “good with it.” Iyanla tells them that they need to work on their individual and collective visions. She feels that Dwight has the tools he needs to build a new relationship when he is ready.
However, both of them decided to give their marriage one more try. Dwight is more aware of his behavior and Marcia learned to express her feelings better.
Lastly, Vakhara and Lamar meet with Iyanla. She tells them to keep working on their relationship, even if they aren’t married. Both of them need to atone for their behavior towards one another, according to Iyanla.
After their time with Iyanla, Lamar says he and Vakhara are working things out and he is being more mindful thinking before he speaks. However, Vakhara claims that Lamar hasn’t changed one bit. As a result, she is planning to file for divorce.
What are your thoughts on the episode?
