Just another column from an educated black man who doesn’t spare feelings or want women to get played because they never really knew where they stood with a man.
By: Mike J.
Women are treated according to their position.
A woman’s position is always defined by the man of interest. Now for you feminists out there who disagree and feel that it is the woman who decides her position, understand that there are plenty of frustrated women out here because they aren’t happy with the position they have with a man they have feelings for. Women may choose what men they have in their lives, but in our brief first moments of meeting women, we decide what position a woman could have in our lives. And there are many positions. The most desired of positions is wifey, boo, girlfriend, fiance and wife. The position no women really wants to be is jump-off, side chick, and late night entertainment. But a lot of women will end up as the latter because they don’t know how to negotiate.
Women need to understand that relationships, just like contracts, come with terms of agreement. Most women aren’t happy with the relationships they have because they never talked about the terms. The chick who only hears from that dude after midnight but wants more, will never get more because she won’t get the courage to talk to him about the contract they have in place.
Like a satisfied business partner, she’ll keep playing her position even though it doesn’t really fit with what she wants out of the relationship. And because she never brings up the arrangement and her problems with it, a man will continue to move forward with whatever relationship they have. She may get some things out of the relationship, like good sex, money, attention, etc.; but she is not getting everything she wanted and will settle just not to lose the few things she did get.
It’s simple. If you want more from the relationship, ask.
If you have more to bring to the table than sex, negotiate the contract. If a man isn’t willing to agree to the new terms you suggest, then why would you keep f-cking him?
You’re only as good as the position you play. Negotiate and get yours.
Wow. I love how you broke it down. I think it is harder for women to just say what we want sometimes and move on when we get it. But that is the only way you get what you want. You have to be clear and not be afraid to be honest. So much time could be saved if we all did this. Great read.
So basically women need to stop being scurrrred and speak up. LOL. Love it Mike.
Word.
Preech! I’ve been telling ladies this for the longest! Take heed to the message, internalize it and APPLY it! This is chess, not checkers!
“If you have more to bring to the table than sex, negotiate the contract. If a man isn’t willing to agree to the new terms you suggest, then why would you keep f-cking him?” | THIS!!!! We all need this stamped to our foreheads! SMH!
Interesting perspective Mike. I think a lot of us are scared to say what we want or speak up so to speak, because we don’t want to scare a guy off. It’s dumb I know, but so many women think by being honest and having higher standards, they will end up alone.
True, but you have to speak up in order to get what you want out of relationships. We aren’t mind readers. And honestly, there’s no other way around this.