Brandi and Taii give a detail of their arrests.
The episode opens with Brandi, Matilda and Taii greeted by Iyanla for their first day together. The three women formed a bond while all serving time in a West Virginia prison.
Despite their bond being a key in surviving in prison, they all are having trouble adjusting to the outside world.
Taii served 3 and a half years on drug conspiracy charges, and entered prison pregnant. She got swept up in charges thanks to her boyfriend who dealt drugs. Taii still claims she never touched the drugs her boyfriend sold.
She feels her time in prison impacted her relationship with her children.
Iyanla asks about Taii’s arrest next, Taii says the police arrested at home with her children present. She thought it was initially believed someone was breaking in to shoot her boyfriend. When she realized it was the police instead, Taii felt relieved.
She was used to being with a man who sold drugs because she grew up in a home that drug selling took place. Her son’s birthday was two days after this. Despite telling him she would be back, Taii missed her son’s birthday party, which saddened her.
Brandi, who served 10 years, also dated a drug dealer. She got pregnant while her boyfriend was running from police.
Her relationship with her son was devastated by this.
Brandi’s father was also a drug dealer, so she felt comfortable dating many, despite her mom and dad sending her to private school growing up.
“I did date drug dealers all my life.” – Brandi
She tells Iyanla she was attracted to drug dealers and the lifestyle that came with it.
“Did it ever occur to you that these black men were pouring poison into the lives of other black people?” – Iyanla
She than asks Brandi how she would feel if someone sold drugs to her son. Brandi said she would want to go after the guy that did it.
“Well, you slept with men that sold drugs to other people’s sons.” – Iyanla
She also points out that their families influenced their comfort being around people who sold drugs.
Iyanla and Matilda hit a rough spot as Matilda claims “survival.”
Matilda says Brandi and Taii reminded her of her two daughters. Iyanla seeks to investigate this relationship. They all were in the same prison for over 3 years.
Matilda was in prison for 18 years. She says Brandi and Taii, “gave her life.”
Matilda was sentenced for 30 years for refusing to testify against her sons, who sold drugs and gave money to her. She says it was needed for survival.
“They didn’t want to see their mother struggling.” – Matilda
Iyanla’s eyebrows raise when Matilda reveals she knew she was taking drug money. Matilda emphasizes it was about survival, and Iyanla refutes this.
“All of your were imprisoned before you were locked up.” – Iyanla
Before they go forward, Iyanla tells them that they have to really open themselves up and accept certain truths about their circumstances in order to heal. Matilda, at this point, isn’t sure why she even agreed to meet with Iyanla.
“I ain’t liking you too much right now.” – Matilda
Taii revealed she gave birth first before going to prison. She got out when he was 5 and he’s not doing well.
Matilda reveals to Iyanla details of her childhood, and Iyanla makes a connection.
After this first meeting, Iyanla has a one on one with Matilda. Matilda tells Iyanla she wants to reconnect with her family. Her daughter tells her that she doesn’t have feelings. Iyanla begins to ask how she became able to accept taking drug money from her kids.
Matilda’s mom had her while in college at 19. Her mom apparently shamed the family and left Matilda with her grandmother at 3 months old.
“I know she loved me but she loved me in a funny way.” – Matilda
Iyanla gets Matilda to realized her mom never really accepted her since she didn’t raise her, but raised her sister instead. When her mom died, she was screaming her name.
Matilda begins to close up talking about her relationship with her mom.
Later, Matilda says she got pregnant at 15 by a 25-year-old man. She begins to cry because she felt lonely, looking for love and a father.
Iyanla consoles her.
Brandi’s hit with a harsh truth from Iyanla.
Next, Iyanla sits with Brandi. Brandi’s father showered her with gifts paid for with drug money. So now, she’s forever attached to looking for men like her father, and what they can give to her.
Iyanla wants Brandi to recognize that behavior and change it. Brandi admits to Iyanla she dated guys for what they could do for her, and Iyanla ask her a harsh question.
“What’s the difference from what you did to a h**ker, a high-class call girl?” – Iyanla
Brandi was taken aback by the question, saying she was not sleeping with men for money. However, Iyanla stands firm on her comparison.
Brandi says it was different because she claimed she had standards of not being with men who couldn’t provided for her. At this point, Brandi agrees.
While in prison, she missed her father’s funeral. She regrets the decisions she made to get locked up.
Iyanla present the ladies with “charges.”
Later on, Iyanla brings them all back together and tells them the striking similarities of their pasts. For example, Brandi’s mom was 16 when she got pregnant by a 31 year-old man. This is similar to Matilda’s story.
Iyanla calls them cautionary tales and that’s what drew them together in prison.
At this point, Iyanla gets a visitor. The man’s dressed as a parole officer would dress. He comes into the room with the women and presents them with “sentences.” Matilda was “charged” with “First Degree Self-Degradation, Corruption of Minors,” and two counts of “Parental Negligence and Abandonment.
Brandi was “charged” with “Felonious Misrepresentation of Self.”
Iyanla says they will have to go to “court” to face their “charges” in two days. This exercise is supposed to change how their look at their mentality of feeling locked up.
Iyanla realizes Matilda is repeating a devastating pattern of behavior.
Day two of their process begins with the ladies joining Iyanla for breakfast. Matilda says she felt like she went back to prison after their first meeting. Brandi says she still had fears of missing counts when she was released. Taii says the counts were degrading.
“It felt like we were stock.” – Taii
Iyanla wants the ladies to understand that they ended up in prison because they weren’t telling the truth about themselves.
A breakthrough happened when Taii admitted she manipulated her mother to allow her to go to a school where she constantly got in trouble. This, despite claiming she wanted to be a doctor growing up.
At this point, Taii begins to cry as Iyanla continues to remain truthful, telling her she gave up on herself. Taii says she felt like she wasn’t supported in her dream of becoming a doctor.
Later on, the ladies talk about how they are trying to reconnect with their kids for going to prison. Iyanla tells them they can not make up for their missed time.
The episode ends with Iyanla meeting with 28 year-old Keashia. Keashia is Matilda’s second youngest child, and 11th out of 12th in line. After Matilda went to prison, according to Keashia, her other siblings abandoned her, except for her sister.
When Iyanla learns Matilda has 12 kids, Iyanla realized she lied. She also learns from Keashia Matilda also had a drug addiction.
What are your thoughts of part one?
