Iyanla and Diamond recap the events which ended with Philando Castile losing his life.
Diamond, age 28, arrives to speak with Iyanla. She says that she and Philando were friends for 10 years, and in a relationship for 4 years.
She says Philando lived up to his mom’s expectations, and was a gentleman. He also brought structure and stability to her. Diamond feels she lost a piece of herself with his death.
“He used to be like my light at the end of the tunnel.” – Diamond
The day of his death, it was a normal day. Diamond says Philando took his firearm with him that day. He had the gun for protection. Their neighborhood was very rough.
When she says he passed away, Iyanla presses Diamond to say he was murdered.
“He passed away?” – Iyanla
“Well, he was taken away.” – Diamond
“Was he taken away?” – Iyanla
“He was murdered.” – Diamond
Diamond begins to cry as Iyanla asks if she can “sit in it.” She struggles with this “Because he was around me 24-7, 365 days…”
Iyanla tells Diamond she can have a life without him.
Diamond then tells them they were pulled over with their daughter in their car on the way from the grocery store. The officer that pulled them over did so because their tail light was out.
Philando reached for his glove compartment to get his registration. But his wallet wasn’t in reach. So, he told the officer he had a firearm. He tried to reach for his wallet in his pocket, but the officer shot him multiple times. Philando got shot 10 times.
At this point, Diamond didn’t know what to do but live stream the aftermath. Iyanla wants to know why she didn’t do anything else. Diamond says the officer told her not to move. When asked if she thought she was going to die, Diamond says, “Yes.”
Diamond’s daughter ran out of the car. Diamond and her daughter ended up in the backseat of a patrol car and Diamond was hand cuffed.
Iyanla then asks what she would say to the officer. “What I want you to know is that you scarred me and my daughter for the rest of our life,” Diamond says during the exercise.
“You exposed us to our deepest fear, that’s losing someone who really loved us.” – Diamond
Iyanla then asks Diamond to consider taking back her power. “[The officer] has to live with this for the rest of his life. You don’t have to,” Iyanla tells Diamond.
“You’ll always have the memory, but you don’t have to live in the trauma of it.” – Iyanla
Overall, Iyanla wants Diamond to move past the pain she’s been feeling.
Diamond meets Sybrina Fulton.
For the second day of healing, Iyanla brings Sybrina Fulton to talk to Diamond. It’s been 5 years since the death of Trayvon Martin for Sybrina.
Iyanla asks if she still lives the trauma and Sybrina says yes.
“I don’t think this is something you ever get used to.” – Sybrina
They then relate her experience to Diamond’s. Sybrina says we need to do what we can so that young people can make it home safely. She also said her son’s death brought forth attention to racial profiling.
They both agree that police officers need more racial and sensitivity training.
Iyanla tells Sybrina that Diamond doesn’t have the support because she wasn’t married.
“But she and her daughter were in the car.” – Iyanla
Next, Iyanla introduces Sybrina to Diamond. The two women exchange a hug. Sybrina tells Diamond that she should find a support group, surrounding herself with positive people.
“That support helped me to strengthen who I was.” – Sybrina
She also tells Diamond to leave behind negative people. Lastly she tells her to trust in the Lord.
Diamond cries when she tells Sybrina, “It’s an honor to be in your presence.”
Iyanla and Diamond sit down with a police officer.
After Sybrina’s meeting is over, Iyanla sits with retired police officer Corey. Iyanla tells Corey that the police aren’t trusted by citizens. Corey calls Philando’s death one of the most horrific police shootings he’s ever seen.
They bring up Tamir Rice’s shooting and how police administration needs to do a better job.
Iyanla says that white cops need to do a better job of respecting black people.
However, Corey says that people need to do a better job of complying with orders.
“Comply, then complain later.” – Corey
His statement doesn’t sit well with Iyanla.
“When you put guns in the hands of fear, you’re gonna have problems.” – Iyanla
Corey clarifies his statements and says not every person deserves to be a cop, to which Iyanla agrees.
Lastly, she then asks if he’s willing to “be in the presence” of Diamond. He agrees.
So Iyanla has Diamond speak to Corey in a safe space to face his fear.
They sit down face to face. She says she fears dying and she associates it with police.
Corey says in New York City, they have victims of police violence address officers in their stations.
But the police in Minnesota haven’t reached out to Diamond. However, they reached out to Philando’s mother.
Corey says that is something that needs to be fixed.
Iyanla asks why Philando Castile is dead, and he says the police officer was afraid.
Diamond seems to have made a breakthrough.
Finally, Iyanla has Lindsay to help Diamond tap away the trauma of Philando’s death. Together with a master in the technique known as energy field tapping, Iyanla leads Diamond in a tapping exercise to help neutralize and expel those negative feelings.
During the exercise, Diamond’s voice goes from uncertain and shaky to strong and empowered.
“You can see it in her face,” – Iyanla
She later says, “Miss Diamond seems to have made a breakthrough.”
After filming, Diamond is using the tools to learn from her experience. She also received $800,000 from the St. Anthony, MN police department, but they haven’t reached out to talk to her.
What did you think of the episode?
